


Hurts Like Hell

by Wings_of_Night



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Angst, BAMF Bilbo Baggins, Battle of Five Armies Fix-It, Character Death, I'm Bad At Summaries, M/M, Majestic Thorin, Sad Bilbo Baggins, Soooo much angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-31
Updated: 2017-11-26
Packaged: 2018-09-21 00:48:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9523955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wings_of_Night/pseuds/Wings_of_Night
Summary: Thorin is dead. Bilbo is heartbroken. He feels like he's irreparably broken. Until he gets an offer. An offer he can't refuse.A pretty angst ridden, sad fic at first, though, in theory, it will get happier. Based on the song: Hurts like Hell by Fleurie. Bad summary, better story.I do not own the Hobbit.





	1. How can I say this without breaking?

**Author's Note:**

> I know what you're thinking, "Night, you've already got two other fics you should be writing. This doesn't look like The Damned Brother or Opening at the close?" I know, I know, I'm sorry, but I had this idea and I needed to get it down. I'm undedicated trash and I know it.

"Thorin!" The hobbit that is Bilbo Baggins gasps out, "look Thorin the eagles are here!" Bilbo's hands are clutching the bloody front of the aforementioned dwarf's coat. A coat that had once made the dwarf look so large and intimidating to the hobbit now only served to make him look small. Hot tears splash from Bilbo's eyes onto the body of Thorin Oakenshield, King under the mountain, "I'm sorry," the hobbit gasps, "please don't leave Thorin. Please don't leave me. I'm sorry I betrayed you, let me prove it," a shuddering breath rattles through his shaking frame, "please," this last please is barely a whisper, said close to the dwarf King's ear, "do not go where I can't follow, Thorin," his desperate, heart-wrenching pleas fall upon deaf ears. After all, no one can awake the dead.

A shout sounds from nearby and Bilbo fumbles frantically to pick up his sword, Sting, from where it lies on the ground. He's ready to defend Thorin's body from orcs to his very last breath. 

Tension leaves his frame when his gaze lands upon Dwalin and a few other members of the company that he does not care to identify currently. The all look a little bloody and battered, but not visibly injured, which is good. 

The relief on Dwalin's face at seeing Bilbo unscathed morphs into grief at the sight of his friend and family member lying upon the ground, as still and cold as the ice that surrounds them. Dwalin and the others rush over. Bilbo steps aside wordlessly, drying his tears on dirty sleeves. He doesn't deserve to cry, he betrayed the company, and even worse, Thorin. In fact, he probably doesn't even deserve to be here.

A grief stricken sound leaves Dwalin, it's laced with sorrow and denial. Nori, Balin, Bifur, Bofur, and Bombur watch on. Bilbo doesn't know where the rest of the company are, nor does he care, not when he feels as though he's intruding upon their grief.

Valar, how will hr say this without breaking? He takes a deep, shuddering breath, "I'll leave now," he says quietly, knowing that his, barely above a whisper, statement probably went unheard. What Bilbo hadn't accounted for, however, was Nori. The thief snags him before he manages to slip away, "ye can't just leave Bilbo," he says, "Thorin would've wanted ye to stay," Bilbo shakes his head, words of denial bubbling up to rest upon his chapped, bloody lips. Words that say, no, he betrayed Thorin. That Bilbo had betrayed Thorin's trust, betrayed Thorin's love. 

Bilbo stamps down that thought immediately. Thorin can't have loved him, not truly, after all, he was just a hobbit and Thorin was a King. Bilbo was just a passing flame. A willing body to sate his lusts with on the long journey from the Shire to Erebor.

Bilbo can't but remember other things though. The soft words and touches, the shared stories and laughs. The illusion that he was trying to build shatters. He almost breaks down then and there, but holds onto his tears despite the burning at his exhausted eyes. It's hard to keep the tears in but he must, he can't look weak right now, "He's right laddie," Balin interjects, "Thorin spoke to me of accommodating you at the mountain before we entered Mirkwood." Bilbo makes a noncommittal sound, "I may stay for a while," he says dully, looking sadly over to where Thorin's body lies. He misses the knowing look Nori sends him.

* * *

 

Bilbo gets away from everyone when he can. When he's far enough away he  _breaks._ Thorin's dead and never coming back. Thorin's  _dead dead dead._ It repeats, a mocking mantra in Bilbo's tormented mind. But it's not just Thorin that's dead, Fili and Kili too. Just boys, barely grown and had not yet got to see the world, and never will. 

Their funerals' are in a few days, he doesn't know how he'll bear it. He'll be expected to say something, all of the company will. He doesn't know how he'll say it without breaking. He can't hold himself together now, whathope does he have making it through an entire speech?

Bilbo stumbles to his bedroll and his soft cries send him to sleep.


	2. Not a chapter but please read

I'm very sorry for having not updated this fic for so long. To be honest I don't really have the inspiration to continue it and am currently rewriting two of my other fics. I may continue in the future so keep an eye out but for now this fic in going to be on the backburner. My most sincere of apologies.

**Author's Note:**

> I must really hate myself because angst literally kills me. Like all my other fics this will be updated infrequently but as much as possible. I will make no promises for when the next chapter will be up.


End file.
